Marriage is said to be the coming together of two different persons united in love; and in the olden days this was worth looking forward to by both young men and ladies with different types of props according to the tradition of the area. In some places in Nigeria, there are fattening rooms for the brides, while in other parts of Nigeria the couple plan towards quickly getting married to have children as their tradition forbids sex before marriage. So many different reasons why people look forward to getting married then. So where did we lose it?
The time most of us dream big and plan to climb the career ladder is in our youthful days. Youths of today are pre-occupied with so many activities that make them adjourn marriage till they feel they have achieved the desirable. Looking back to those days when our parents and grandparents got married at 20 years and had all their children before 30 years is quite different. Today, a youth of 30 years is less concerned about marriage.
From the Guys Perspective: They see marriage as a burden they are not ready to shoulder until they get to a certain age; while others are not encouraged to propose because they claim the ladies out there are not ‘wife material’ and the ‘homely’ type. They believe making money is the ultimate and they will find a wife when they are made because most women are on the look-out for made men. They feel ladies are too career driven and want to get to the top of their career ladder before allowing the ‘right guy’ into their lives.
From the Ladies Perspective: Most guys out there are cheaters and they can’t stay with one woman. They claim to love you but do the opposite. If they are unable to meet the least of your needs while dating, how will they meet more when you are married to them. Their parents seem too dictate especially their mothers (we aren’t ready for the mother-in-law to wife power struggle). As ladies, they want to have a career and a beautiful marriage but wonder if their men agree because some of them want a ‘stay at home wife’. They want a man that can give them the world not the one that will take their freedom from them and enslave them.
Whereas on the other hand, what these set of people do not realise however is that just like going to school at the ages spelt out by school curriculum, you need not achieve the whole world before choosing the right partner.
The choice of the right partner which culminates into marriage should not be dependent on making money or attaining a particular feat career wise but should be based on shared ideas/ideals with a partner regardless of the finance aspect attached to relationship as seen today.