Thousands of couples exchange wedding vows, which bind them together in marriage. Many of these couples break their vows within a year or even months because they probably did not take the vows seriously. It might be of interest that some people do not keep their vows because they did not understand what they promised to do.
In today’s world, marriage is misunderstood and consequently abused by a lot of people. Couples are unfaithful to their vows because they don’t understand its impact on their marriage.
Do you really understand the vows you exchanged with your spouse at the altar in the presence of many witnesses (family, friends and well-wishers)?
Do you see your vow as a recitation which is part of the wedding ceremony?
Have you lost faith in your marital vows?
These and more are possible reasons responsible for deviation from marital vows. When a couple gets married they give their word – their sacred honor – that they will keep the promises they made on that day. These vows should be sacred to them, for they are sacred to God.
You vowed “for better for worse”. If the vow meant, “we will stay married as long as we’re happy”, there would be no need for a vow”.
You vowed “till death do us part”. If the vow meant, “we could divorce when trouble comes in our marriage, there would be no need for a vow”.
Let’s look at the possible reasons responsible for deviation from marital vows:
- Do you find it difficult forgiving your spouse when there is a misunderstanding?
- Are you unfaithful to your spouse?
- Are you hiding your past deeds from your spouse?
- Have you neglected your spouse because he/she has a terminal disease?
- Do you hate, dishonour, discomfort and don’t protect your spouse.
- Does your wealth/status prevent you from honouring and submitting to your husband?
- Do you embarrass you spouse publicly or you scream at him/her indiscriminately?
- Do you hardly laugh (over a joke) with your spouse or you laugh at him/her?
- Have you thought or always think of divorcing your spouse?
- Do you struggle with communicating and understanding your spouse?
You have broken the promises you made in your marital vows if you hold on to one or more of the reasons from the above questions. Your marriage vows are much easier to keep when you enjoy being in it.
When you start taking your marriage seriously, the reasons (that make you deviate from your vows) will fade out gradually.
Marriage is a covenant relationship that is very sacred. WE is greater than ME, you have to die daily to self. Marriage is about teamwork and not individual work. Don’t think of yourself above your marriage. Esteem your vows above your problems.
Maybe you took your vows at a vulnerable time in your life, and you feel like it was a mistake. Even so, you vowed, and vows matter because at one point in your life, you loved this man/woman enough to marry him/her.
Can you find that in your heart again?
“It’s time for you to dust off those old vows, read them to your spouse again, and let him/her know they are still worth keeping every word you spoke”.