“Infertility is the inability to have a child or more children despite how desperately you may want to. Yeah, it pretty much stinks. All you and your spouse want to do is bring a child into your home and share your love with him or her. Then month after month, you’re disappointed over and over again. Some couples go through this for years and years. It’s the kind of struggle that can make or break a marriage”.
Going through infertility is definitely stressful, but it can teach you a lot about each other and help you bond. Infertility can strain connection between couples especially when they’ve been trying for a while. Couples trying to conceive should have an open mind free of worries and also avoid any form of argument or situation that can prolong their waiting period. Crying together, celebrating even small victories, attending doctor’s visits together, talking about your hopes and worries and many other things can help you become closer to one another.
So how do you make sure your marriage is strengthened and stays strong through this challenge? Here are some ideas that can help you:
Keep intimacy and sex alive: Sex is not only for procreation but also for satisfaction and enjoyment with your spouse. Couples might tend to loose interest in sex because fertilization didn’t occur – create more time for sex and make it enjoyable for you both because you don’t know when fertilization will occur if you stop sex. Staying intimate and romantically connected is one of the surest things you can do for a happy, lasting marriage.
Reciprocate Argument/Fight with Love: Infertility may prompt your partner to say something selfish or out of place occasionally due to pressure of any kind but you should choose to respond with tenderness not toughness. If you have been under each other’s skin more than usual, it’s not necessarily time to panic but show love to him/her. “Relationships that are close and positive can also be very irritating”.
Friends/Family Intrusion: Control friends/family involvement in your marriage especially when it comes to proffering infertility solutions. Though some of their solutions might be harmless but you and your spouse need to draw the line and decide whose solution you want to run with or not to run with any of their solutions and wait on God.
To every couple struggling to have a child, don’t tie your identity to being parents only.
With infertility, create a marriage that is safe, secure and long lasting.